


masochist

by polywitch



Category: No Fandom
Genre: poem
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-13
Updated: 2020-10-25
Packaged: 2021-03-07 20:29:22
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 473
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26993698
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/polywitch/pseuds/polywitch
Summary: vent poems about a boy i used to be in love with
Kudos: 3





	1. i don't miss you

I don't miss you  
Not a single day goes by where I don't smile  
because you're not in my life  
I don't miss you  
I know you're not the person I once fell in love with  
Who even were you, anyway?  
I don't miss you  
I know you never reciprocated  
You just wanted my love  
because your mother never gave you any  
I don't miss you  
You tore my heart out and left me bleeding years ago  
And I had to clean up the mess after you  
I don't miss you  
But I can't forget you  
I still feel cheated when my friends mention you  
I still feel cheated  
because I have to act as if I forgave you  
because I have to act as if my view of you hasn't changed  
because I have to act as if I miss you  
because I have to act as if our relationship can be saved  
as if we're still the friends we once were


	2. process of forgetting

I don't want your lips on mine  
I don't want you to touch me  
I don't want you to look at me

I've stopped wondering what we could've been   
a long time ago

But sometimes I wonder  
If I could go back to do things differently  
If I would be able to resist you

If I met you on the street or in a bar  
Would I be able to tear my eyes off of you?

You're so magnetic, so untouchable  
Beautiful in the most disgusting sense  
I can't get enough of you

I know you don't think of me  
But I wish you did   
I wish you felt the same disgust that I do  
I wish you felt as empty as I do  
Just a grim passing thought of a memory you'd rather forget


	3. sunglasses

And with the words  
"My name is ...  
And I like semolina dessert"  
Amor tore out the heart from my chest  
Left me bleeding on the floor  
And none of our classmates  
Of our friends  
Called 911  
And why would they?  
It was my fault wasn't it?  
You were so radiant  
I should've worn sunglasses


	4. moving on

My soulmate has died  
And I will never feel whole again  
Unlike the night we spent   
Intoxicated looking into each other's eyes  
Quiet thieves   
Hiding from people in our little paradise

For dinner you ate my heart   
I decided to starve  
From everyone's hearts, you chose mine  
You would give me yours eventually  
It feels good to be preferred

My soulmate has died  
And I will never feel whole again  
His last meal was my brain  
Quenching his thirst with my blood  
Quiet thief  
Leaving my lifeless body behind

Paradise never existed  
And no policemen will work on this case of identity theft  
I've stopped feeling cold a long time ago  
I was born again  
With a skin you never touched


End file.
